Nurul Anjani

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thats0jack:

PLEASE REBLOG AND HELP SAVE LIVES!

I encourage you to listen to this entire video, and to truly listen. Find the time to listen to this, and help make a change. Close your eyes. Imagine yourself. Your life. Your friends. Your family. For the next few minutes, just imagine…

You feel alone. You feel like you have no one there for you. You had a shitty day. Something has to go wrong, every single day. Whether it’s a fight with your best friend, your parents, or just a fight within yourself, every day seems like it’s an uphill battle. A battle to get out of bed, and to face the world. But this one day, whether it is actually today, or a day in 5 years from now, is a day that will change everything. You get home from school. You’re all alone in your house. The silence is so loud. You walk into your room, and lie down on your bed. Thinking of the day, and how awful it was. You think of the names you were called, or the way some of your friends treated you, and feel sick to your stomach. You ask yourself, “Why am I still here when all everyone wants is for me to be gone?” You imagine yourself leaving the planet. You’re curious to know how people would react if they found out you were gone. Whether you struggle with your appearance, weight, sexuality, or any of the other battles teens face every single day, you know that you can’t stick it out any longer. You can’t hold on. Playing the happy card and using your fake smile will only get you so far. Wether you’re the funny kid that everyone knows of, or the shy kid that minds your own business, you know that you can’t hold on any longer. So you don’t. You get up out of bed. You’re sad, but also very angry. You want to make a point to everyone, you want people to remember you, and regret the mean things they said. You know something has to be done. You crack. You choose to go with pills. Because you know there is no way you could ever follow through with any other methods. You’re scared. So very scared. But you know it’s time. So you take the pills out of the cabinet, and gather up some paper and a pencil. You write little, hoping it’ll be just enough to be heard and to leave an imprint. You write to your parents and apologize for what you are about to do. You write to your friends, and assure them that your joking around and fun name calling wasn’t what pushed you over the edge. You then write to all the people that didn’t give you a chance, and that shut you down. The people that made fun of you, or didn’t give you an opportunity to be yourself. You don’t name names, but you know who they are. And they know who they are. You write to them, hoping that they’ll read it and feel the sense of pain that you felt. You finish the letter and fold it up. You see your tears soaked into the paper, and start crying harder. This is reality, this is happening. You pick up the pills, open the bottle, and don’t hesitate. A handful of them you figured could do it. You start to feel dizzy. And then it hits you, you’re gonna die. You’re going to be that kid. That kid who dies, and who leaves your town in shock. You’re crying so hard, thinking of your family. You feel a sense of regret, questioning whether or not this was the right choice. You’re dying. Everything you’ve ever worked for is vanishing. You start screaming for help. You cry out for your mom, wanting her there to hold you. But she’s not there. You’re scared, and need her there for you. You keep screaming, hoping someone will hear you. But no one does, and no one will. You fade. You fall to the ground, and you’re dead. That’s it. All done… But it’s not. Your mom comes home to see her baby lying on the floor, DEAD. You just killed her inside. She instantly screams and calls 911. She’s panicking, and can’t catch her breath. She’s crying hysterically. But her tears won’t bring you back, because you’re dead. She will never be able to get this image out of her head. Flashbacks of this will haunt her, for the rest of her life. Your school is notified, and your friends find out. Your entire school is in shock. Your school is silent, for days. They lost a friend, classmate, student. They lost a soul. You will forever be known to that school. You will never leave the minds and hearts of those people. Even the people who didn’t give you that chance, or that teacher that gave you a bad grade, or that classmate that gave you a nasty look. You will still forever be in their hearts. Your friends are mortified. They cry at night, blaming themselves for not sending you a text, a text that could have saved your life. Your family is silent for days, nothing is normal. Your family is falling apart. Your dad works late hours just so he doesn’t have to go home and sit in the house where you vanished. Your mom loses her job, but she doesn’t care, because she lost her baby. She thinks for hours on end about your childhood and your life. She holds on to the good memories that you had together. She raised you, but blames herself for not raising you to be stronger. Your sister and brother don’t go to school. They get hundreds of messages saying “I’m sorry for your loss.” Your facebook wall which is still up, is filled with apologies. The only thing is, you’re not there to see it. You’re not there to see all the people that care about you. It’s funny when your dead how people start listening. Only if those people would have given you a shot to be who you are and to show them the real you. Only if they gave you a chance to shine BEFORE it was too late. Only if they didn’t say those nasty things. Everything would be so much different, but you couldn’t handle it. You are loved by so many people, and saddest part is is that its only showing now that you’re gone. So many people were behind you, rooting for you. My message for the people out there watching my video, is that in no way is suicide the answer. You will make it through anything that is bringing you down. Stick it out, and you won’t regret it. Many amazing things will happen in your life, but none of them will happen if you end it. Would you rather be known as the person who took their own life, or the person who stuck it out, and succeeded. In no way is this trying to make suicide look like a selfish act or a cowardly act, but however, I am encouraging everyone to have a new outlook on this action of suicide. Whether you are suicidal, struggle with personal issues, or know someone who is suicidal, I am here to tell you that you are loved. If you feel like no one else cares about you, know that I do. You have so much to live for and such a bright future ahead of you, you don’t want to end it all now. Don’t prove your point now, prove it later when you are living your successful life and can look back on the kids that never gave you a chance. I’m here to tell anyone watching this video, that it’s never too late to become a better person. It’s never too late to do a nice thing for another person.There’s still some hurting teens out there that could use your help and kind words. No matter how COOL you think you are, or how weird you may think someone is, you are never too cool to do a nice thing, say a nice thing, or be a good person. And someone is never too weird to receive a compliment or nice deed. Everyone out there is hurting in their own way. Don’t be that kid who tries to look cool around his friends, just be that nice person who is there for others. Don’t be that person who judges other people for what they like to do, or how they dress, be that person that encourages difference, and accepts others. Don’t be that person to bring down another, be that person to build up another. Suicide should not be the way out. Together we can make a difference. Be there for people, because you know what it’s like to have no one there. 

Help make a difference by sharing this video with your friends and family. Easily spread the word by liking this video, posting it to facebook, and reblogging it on tumblr from the link below. Together, we can save lives. Even if it’s just one. 

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(Source: youtube.com)